IVF = In-Vitro Fertilization.
And what is In-vitro Fertilization? "Is that where they mix eggs and sperm in a petri dish?" people often ask me. For lack of a better explanation, um, Yes.
Obviously, there is much more to it. IVF is one of the biggest wonders of science. So many people find themselves where my husband and I are, unable to conceive on their own and want to know why. As with any and all other medical problems, there is always a reason. Though it's not always easy to discover right away, there is most definitely always a medically scientific reason a couple cannot conceive a child.
For Mike & I, we arrived at this point to try IVF after a long LONG 8 year road of trying this and that, finally introducing a doctor in the equation after a year, then gradually getting more and more medically involved as the years went by. After every other type of fertility testing and treatment had been exhausted, IVF was our last resort. The highly expensive, highly emotional, and little did we know at the time, HIGHLY controversial choice.
Only after we began our venture into the scary world of IVF preparation, did we begin to see the huge controversy about it. For us, it felt downright offensive that anyone actually thought we shouldn't do it. Their reasons? Ranging anywhere from people claiming to be naturalists to the Godly righteousness of some so called "Christians", these people think that because IVF is a science, it interferes with all that is natural in the world. For the religious stand point, it's the belief that humans are playing the hand of God, and therefore, IVF shouldn't be an option. We should just accept the fact that we are barren and infertile and live our lives out without children--or of course, just adopt (see post on Why don't you just adopt?).
Before I get any further in the explaining the IVF process, let me first just say this: If you are one of those people who believe that people shouldn't have the right to undergo scientific treatments like IVF in order to conceive a child, I suppose you are also against abortion & vasectomies for sure, but you should also be against pre-natal care, basic doctor check-ups, blood tests and surgical procedures, even chemotherapy and radiation for cancer patients. Because you should know that everything in the medical field is science-based and if you allow them, you are just being ignorant.
And as for the "will of God" people, do you really believe that scientists are trying to "play the hand of God"? This is one of the biggest reasons I don't abide with any church religion anymore. Any God I believe in wouldn't be so ridiculous as to create such an intelligent species who he knew would excel at science, and then expect them not to use it!
If I have already mentioned this, let it just be an emphasis on the fact that INFERTILITY IS A MEDICAL PROBLEM, NOT A CHOICE!!!!!!!! And, honestly, if you have a problem with couples choosing to do IVF to have a child they would normally never be able to have, go ahead and believe what you want, but please... until you've walked a mile in their shoes, don't judge. We don't need to hear things like "I could never do that!" or "We don't believe in interfering with God's plan for us." Statements like these are just tactless and offensive. Chances are, you don't know what you'd do if you were in our shoes. There are a lot of things I used to believe before going through such a life altering thing as infertility. Life changes us, and regardless of what you might believe at one time, I think everyone should allow themselves room for change. We never stop learning. Life is a school, and experience is your teacher.
Okay, now that that's settled, I will try to explain to the best of my knowledge (in the form of several posts from here on out) the long, detailed and exciting process of undergoing IVF. We are about ready to begin our first IVF cycle. (And I should mention I am on several hormone altering medications, hence the above paragraph. They make me more bold, but honestly, I did mean every word.) The 6 months prior to this have been spent completing the required various "pre-IVF" testing, which includes several blood tests, genetic testing, and reviewing previous medical records and surgical procedures. These help alert our fertility doctor of any conditions or problems we might have or need to take care of prior to undergoing IVF, and help us gain the best chances at success.
This past week, we made all the finalized plans and pretty much signed our lives and life savings away in commitment to IVF. We completed the loan process for the remaining amount of money we didn't raise for it, ordered our $3k worth of fertility prescriptions, and bought our plane tickets for the 3 week trip to California where our fertility clinic is. Everyone is paid as of today, and we are once again flat broke. With me out of a job and my husband the only one working, we are a little concerned for the months following IVF. It was our hope that we could get a loan big enough to pay off some of our debts and take care of some really neglected home & car repairs so that we would be prepared for life with baby... but unfortunately, we were unable to do this. The bank says we don't make enough money. Yeah, I was stumped too. I'll use my husband's exact words: "Naturally! If we did make enough money, why would we be asking you for a loan?!?!??!!!" This was especially confusing because our primary reason for the loan was to consolidate our debts. Seriously. Banks need to send their policy-writers back to school.
So, where was I? Oh yeah, our prescriptions arrived today via FedEx overnight in a big box. In it includes every medication we'll be needing to complete our IVF cycle, including all the needles and a free sharps container for disposal! What we get to do is watch a video in order to teach Mikey how to inject me with hormones everyday for a month. We start Sunday with the first injection. I can't help but be a little apprehensive about allowing my husband to shoot me up with a needle, being as I am the medical professional, and he is the librarian. LOL! But I will be strong and have immense faith in you, sweetheart! :)
